A Memoir
Author: Shavaun Scott
Genre: Memoirs/Biographies
Hardcover; Paperback
ISBN #: 1965784119; 1965784129
Pierian Springs Press
248 Pages
$29.00; $22.00 Amazon
April 14, 2025
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Nightbird, by Shavaun Scott's profoundly intimate memoir that charts one woman's perilous journey through a childhood steeped in religious guilt, suffocating family dynamics, and an industrial hometown where "breathing was dangerous" -- amid cycles of abuse, gaslighting, and heartbreak she fights to hold onto her sense of self -- until a haunting moment where the man she has loved leaves her with a devastating goodbye, casting blame at her feet.
Scott takes us through the turbulence of a life shaped by deep-rooted superstition, fundamentalist religion, and crushing grief. Themes of mental illness and intimate partner abuse are explored with unflinching honesty. Scott sheds light on this poorly understood topics, on the aggressive nature of a subtype of suicide associated with domestic violence. She shows us the motivations behind revenge suicide, and the process of recovering from it.
Propelled by a fierce will to understand the human mind, Shavaun discovers psychology as both salvation and profession. As she transitions from a frightened, isolated child to a crisis intervention therapist, she bears witness to the complicated truths behind mental illness and the limits of therapy. Nightbird is her raw testament: a testament to survival, the power of community, and the liberation that comes from naming our shadows and breaking free of self-destructive bonds. Visceral, unflinching, and ultimately hopeful, Nightbird reminds us that healing is possible -- even after standing on the edge of our darkest fears as she paints a poignant portrait that sheds a bright light on intimate partner abuse leading to revenge suicide, grief, and the hard-won transformation of self-recovery.
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When I started reading this book, I wasn't sure if I wanted to continue. Why? Because I, myself, have been a victim of domestic abuse and both an ex-boyfriend and ex-husband who killed themselves. (one by carbon monoxide in his car, the other by stabbing himself in the heart). I wondered for years what I had done wrong, what was wrong with me, why was I drawn to abusive men? It wasn't until I met my now-husband that I realized it wasn't my fault; but the demons were still there.
Shavaun Scott writes a raw memoir of her bringing-up and her journey to the life she has now. She's traveled a rough road, strewn with ghostly bodies of people who shaped her life; few of them in a positive way. It's open, compelling, sad, and leaves you feeling lost, and somewhat empty. But that's what it is supposed to do. You are supposed to feel; to try and understand everything she's gone through that's made her the woman she is today.
She's been through hell and back, and still survived. Survived stronger and healthier. Survived by taking control of her own life. Fighting her demons and winning. Realizing that only you have the power to shape your life in the way you want.
Her husband committed suicide in a horrific way; one that was meant to raise all the guilt and pain inside her and make her think about him daily. It was mean, selfish, and cruel. Ms. Scott was able to overcome this only by allowing her grief to run its course and give her the chance to live the life she has always wanted.
It brought my own demons to the surface; things I've left unsaid and live inside my mind. Perhaps someday I will be able to lay them to rest, and this book has given me hope.
This is not an easy book to read. It hurts to read it; to think that she had to grow up alone and wanting; wanting affection; wanting direction; wanting to know who she was. But the ending gives her hope, and she finally finds the peace she's been looking for. A memoir that stays with you after the book is read, and worth all the time.
I was given a copy of this book from the publisher and Edelweiss but this in no way influenced my review.
More on Shavaun Scott's Books: https://www.amazon.com/stores/author/B00SP9A9ZO/about?ccs_id=c5c9a91b-1ae0-497b-a39b-2d2a5b9811b6
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